Jaundiced Spirit (loveforbabies) wrote,
Jaundiced Spirit
loveforbabies

kanakuk, best friend, and God

WOW-- it's already Saturday, this week has flown by so quickly....last night my dad showed me a list of really great colleges that we'll easily be able to afford, and he told me that if I'm going to graduate a year early, I'm going to have to get my act together and start thinking about where I want to apply, because I am starting this fall!!! When I really started to think about as I was TRYING to fall asleep, I got kind of scared and excited, almost bewildered that this time in 2 years I could be already finished with my freshman year in college, and still not even be 18 yet....WOW....yet another exciting thing popped into my head, I could be done with my Bachelor's, adn be headed off to my Master's, ......oooohhh...fun stuff, eh???? GOd, well, He's my Lord, my life.....I am nothing.....CAN do nothing, BE nothing without him and his help, I have to have hgis help to breathe, have a beating heart....it's amazing....I can't even type these letters without him behind me....I knwo that this is helping me and or another person, why else would I be doing this??? SPreading God's awesome love and glorifying Him wiht the word's He puts in my mouth, it's what I wa made for...Instead of watching summer catch with my sister, I'm here, typing...

I went on a walk today up the side of this mountain outside the resort I'm staying at, funny, but I'm staying in Purgatory,CO.....yeah....scary stuff....lol.....

Cameron, my best friend....the closest I've ever had, We've developed strong personalities together, and helped each other grow soo much stronger in our faith in Christ...though we've had our fallen times, we've gotten back up with a new strength as best friends...I must admit, June 9th arose some feelings I didn;t know i could feel, soo close, soo innertwined with someone else, though, it feels like it's so complicated, it's also soo simple, just let things happen, spur of the moment, like, the 21st....even after our newly announced friendship...or however you would call it, words, so overrated sometimes...

Sometimes I feel so confused about the way I feel, and sometimes it's so clear, Somehow I try to make excuses for my confusion-like my age, 15, soooooooooo young, but then again, I might be heading off to college in about a year, I'll be a jun ior next year....ti doesn't add up......

soo many memories in such a small box
misplaced somewhere along the way
I seemed to have found the trail I lost
back to where I once stayed
dissipation is not a word I know
but new found love that only grows
day by day I see your face
................................................

I laugh at myself sometimes....you would think that after meeting so many people I would learn to not be soo attached to new acquaintances and friends....I already miss taylor, ryan and well....a few othe rpople I met around the beach....

funny stuff.....

out for today....I;'m going to kanakuk colorado tomorrow for 2 weeks...a christian sports camp...I;m sooooo excited....my sis and I spent a lot fo time together decoratring trunks we bought for camp, and just packing and stuff....wow.....decorating is way too much fun.... I'm leaning back towards interior design....not quite architecture....I want to be more focused on where the home grows from, inside....

I'm dissappointed, no service in the mountains, or signal for cell phones, I would have called cameron sooo much earlier...I'm going to call him in a sec...he's prolly at church...but I HAVE to talk to him....tlaking to him helps link me back to the life I had in CA....kind of still have....but CA is my home, if only for a short while, but it means everything to me...I fouond myself there.....always will love it there....not to mention my new found obsession wiht surfing...out
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I love you so much, Sarah...

your home is always here if that's where God leads you... but distance doesn't hinder homage. No matter how far you are from California, you're always sensed.

:-)